We're three weeks into summer vacation and it's already feeling like a blur that's going by way too fast. I know I say this every season, but can summer last forever, pleeeease? We're loving our hot summer pool & river days, breezy hammock evenings, and weekend family hikes. We end each day sweaty and dirty and chlorinated and sleepy and happy. Summer is also our season of birthdays, and we're so excited to celebrate Declan in a few days.
A few updates on life lately:
Ez officially has one year of school under his belt. His graduation was chaotic and tiring, which basically sums up the entire school year, if I'm being one hundred percent honest. During the graduation ceremony Ez was running off the stage while Declan was simultaneously trying to run onstage and truthfully, after a particularly brutal week of tear-filled dropoffs, I was so, so ready for summer vacation.
But, with the distance of three weeks to buffer the frazzled nerves and exhaustion, I look back on those preschool graduation pictures and remember it for what it was, a really sweet celebration to cap off a growth-filled, pivotal year for our Ez. Even though he refused to wear his cap and gown ("I don't like it. It isn't comfortable.") and he wasn't about to sing any of the songs (although he knew all the words), he did run onstage and cross over the bridge all by himself when they called his name. Maybe my expectations were especially low by that point, but I was so, SO proud of him. And when it came time to sing the final goodbye song, he climbed right up the steps and sang his little heart out, waving happily the whole time. We are so proud of our preK graduate.
After battling the school district quite a bit these past few weeks, doing lots of research, drawing up lengthy pros and cons lists, and having some in-depth heart to heart talks, Joe and I have decided to follow our gut and keep Ez in preK another year. We know he will benefit so much from an added year of maturity and his foundation will be that much stronger when he does start kindergarten.
Ez began his ABA therapy sessions this week, and despite the teary dropoffs (which we expected), he seems to enjoy his time there. This new morning routine has been quite the adjustment for us, but I think we're all adapting well and it's nice to have a bit of structure in our summer days.
We've also begun the process of getting Decky assessed for autism. This second time around has been easier in some ways, mainly because we know what to expect, but answering all those forms a second time around is emotionally draining, to say the least. We're so fortunate to have discovered Alta Regional this time around, and they've really streamlined the process for us and helped out so much. I'm also incredibly lucky to have found a support network of moms through Ez's school who have already navigated these confusing pathways and have offered so much guidance and support. Between assessments, doctors, the school district, ABA, and too many acronyms to keep track of, I don't know how anyone can get through an autism diagnosis without an extensive support group. I've gone from never checking my email and not needing a calendar these past four years, to having white boards, checklists, phone reminders, alarms, and on and on. It's been a steep learning curve but we're doing it, and things are finally falling into a nice rhythym for Ez, and moving in the right direction for Declan.
Wishing you all a lovely summer filled with just the right amounts of relaxation and adventure!
For no good reason at all I've been on an unintentional blogging break. Maybe it's burnout from the move? Or laziness because now that blogger and my phone no longer get along I have to actually get out my laptop when I want to blog? Or maybe I've just been reacquainting myself with my bookworm side and have had a lucky string of really good books that have kept me captive. (Hotel on the Corner of Bitter & Sweet, The Things They Carried, and Some Luck if you happen to be looking for really old book recs).
Joe has been dropping not so subtle hints along the lines of "why do I even check your blog anymore?" which have escalated to "I'm going to unbookmark the blog because you never put anything new up there," so, just for my number one fan, here's a little update on life lately in our new hometown.
When it hasn't been raining in record proportions we've been out and about exploring our new surroundings. On a cold, cloudy day we decided on a whim to visit the Sacramento Zoo, and thanks to the weather we were among the very few people wandering around that day. Cold cloudy days are the BEST zoo days. The crowds are gone and the animals are out. Not only did we see the normally elusive big cats (my fave), but the giraffes put on quite a show for us, sprinting back and forth several times for no apparent reason. I'm not sure if you've ever seen giraffes run in person, but they're a gangly uncoordinated mess and it looks like their long legs are going to get tangled up pretzel style. Check out the video below if my description is lacking ;)
Declan was completely into the whole zoo experience, pointing and yelling at the animals, stomping any puddles he could find, and trying to chase down the train every time it passed by. Ez gave us precisely 2.5 seconds at each exhibit before he demanded we go. Then, as we finally left for real he exclaimed, in all seriousness, "Well that was fun!" Ummm...really? Toddlers will forever be a mystery to me.
One of the first orders of business after the move was to get ourselves a library card. Well, after those other pesky tasks like unpacking, stocking the fridge, getting cable set up...you know, the boring stuff. And I'm very pleased to report that the downtown Sacramento Library does not disappoint. You can always tell a good library by the kids' area, and this one had the best setup I've ever seen. A whole floor all to themselves with a craft corner, an entire wall of toys, that felt board that Ez was obsessed with, and tons of other toys and books. The boys were completely entertained by it all while I got myself a huge stack of books.
And then storytime began.
I'm not sure why, but my kids seem to think storytime is a traumatic experience on the same level as shots at the doctor's office. They love reading books at home, just not at the library. I've tried and tried to make them like it. I have fantasies of us all going to storytime and having a wonderful, magical time. But the reality is that Ez immediately starts whining to leave and Declan starts bolting around the room knocking books off shelves or trying to escape. It's just not happening. So we took the hint and left. The important thing is I got my books ;)
Grandma Kat came up for a visit and we decided to take the opportunity to visit Fairytale Land, a little play area aimed at kids around Ez's age. There were a few farm animals to look at, a playground, some crazy steep and twisty slides that may have traumatized Declan forever, and some other smaller structures for the kids to climb all over. They had a good time but Joe and I aren't convinced it's any better than our neighborhood park so I'm not sure we'll be back.
And of course we wouldn't be real Sacramento tourists if we didn't stop by Old Town. This is probably Ez's favorite spot because of the trains. At first we were fooled into thinking he wanted to see the old trains parked on the tracks there, but it turns out what he really means when he asks to go see trains is to go to the toy store with an elaborate model train setup. And then talk us into buying a toy. Sneaky boy.
As promised, here are those crazy giraffes:
If you made it this far, thanks for not giving up completely on the blog! I know I have some emails to return and I'm sorry for the delay. I LOVE reading your comments so expect replies shortly.
Every now and then Joe gives me a list of things I should record in this little ol' blog here so we don't forget it, which is usually my not so subtle reminder that it's been a while since I've done a life lately post. Like the way Ez is obsessed with reciting both Little Blue Truck books by heart or how Declan has to get down and dance anytime there is a snippet of music playing. They both seem like completely different people compared to even just a few months ago and I want to remember every crazy little thing they do. Declan is developing into a little jokester goofball who will do pretty much anything for a laugh. Ez is getting to that (mostly) fun age where he says crazy things out of nowhere and cracks Joe and me up. They're each at the perfect age to interact and play with each other and they're really starting to get the hang of this whole "having a brother" thing.
Family Life Lately
We are so, so, so blessed that Joe gets to work from home now. It's been the best thing for our family and Ez and Declan are on cloud 9 having Daddy time all throughout the day. Ez has switched over to becoming a total daddy's boy in the last few weeks and I'm basically chopped liver now. He just shadows Joe all day saying, "look at this Daddy," and when I try to chime in he'll repeat again, "look at this, Daddy." Ok, point taken kid. That being said, Joe working from home goes a little something like this:
Sitting on toys with a basketball bouncing off his head while on his laptop pretty much sums it up. Not sure how he pulls it off, but somehow he does.
In the evening we're all about family walks, or just running laps through the house over and over and over till everyone passes out from exhaustion. Well, when we don't all have a nasty flu, anyway. It's becoming very apparent that I live in a house full of boys because roughhousing is pretty much everyone's favorite pastime. Except mine. Apparently I don't have that gene that likes wrestling. Thankfully that's where daddy comes in.
Ez Lately
Moving to a house with a backyard is basically like Christmas and birthdays all rolled into one. Ez wakes up and the first thing he says is, "Wanna play in the backyard?" Clearly we've been depriving him and he's making up for lost time. Laying face down, elbow deep in the dirt is his happy place. He's my little earth worm. And after a nice long digging and rock collecting session he'll come in with his mud-streaked face and say "that was so much fun!" which makes all the extra laundry so worth it.
When he's not outside he's either asking if he can use "his" ipad, or eating. Seriously, that kid wants to eat every 30 minutes like clockwork. Apples are still the snack of choice and I have to cut him off or he'd eat a tree's worth every day. Also, it's a pretty good sign that my kid has seen one too many Youtube videos when he starts telling us, "Thanks for watching! Please subscribe." We've pretty much got a locked in subscription for the next 15 years or so... ;) Also thanks to Youtube Ez is basically a nonstop jukebox of nursery rhymes and songs. "Brother finger brother finger where are you? Here I am, here I am, how do you do?" is the current soundtrack of my life.
Despite the great upsides of our new place, there was definitely a turbulent little period when all the recent change caught up with Ez and he was basically a storm of emotions all throughout the day. When he's happy and excited he's the most bouncy exuberant little being you've ever met, but when he's pissed he's PISSED. Not sure if it's the move, a growth spurt, his age, or what...but it's a little hard to keep up with. I could do a whole post on "reasons my son is crying" and it would go something along the lines of: he asked to watch monster trucks so I turned on monster trucks; he asked for pink yogurt but all we had was blue yogurt; he wanted the yellow (box) mac & cheese not the blue one I gave him; he wants to play with the one missing toy instead of the 3,574 toys already strewn across the floor; the apple I gave him was "too big".... I think you get the idea.
Declan Lately
Declan is in that adorable gibberish stage and I really really wish I knew what he was trying to say. His made up language sounds like a cross between Arabic and Russian and there are certain sounds he'll repeat daily but I have no idea what they could possible mean. If anyone can translate Ah Shaka Doh for me, that'd be great, thanks. He likes to yell that at me periodically and for now I can only assume it means something along the lines of "bring me food, woman!" His English vocabulary has also grown a lot lately. "Doh!" (go or no), "Ca-kwa" (crackers), "wawawa" (water), "ba" (milk/bottle), "Ga doh?" (get down), Toooo!!! (Tootles - usually followed by a piercing scream) "dadada" (Dada). No mama yet though :(
He's forever my rambunctious troublemaker and whenever he gets caught redhanded doing something he shouldn't be he tilts his head to one side and sidles away without making eye contact, like if he can't see you, you can't see him. Some of his trouble making specialties include: dumping any glass of water he can find all over the floor. Splashing in the toilet. Typing on Joe's laptop the second it's unattended. Turning off the wifi. Storing bits of food in his toy garbage truck and then pulling them out for a snack later.
He does this wonky back and forth run like a little drunken sailor when he's trying to be silly and get a laugh out of us. His favorite perch is on the stairs landing where he can look down on the family room and watch whatever's on TV from his own private viewing box. Joe and I will be sitting at the table and all of a sudden this little blur of a boy goes running past full speed on his way to the stairs like he's on a mission. And speaking of running, running off and leaving us in the dust is becoming a pattern with him. Like that time he ran behind the bar at Outback and scared the crap out of me. He has the opposite of survival skills. If there's danger within a four mile radius he's automatically drawn to it. He just can't help himself. Gives whole new meaning to this meme:
Except there's a good chance I haven't showered...
Brothers
Ez and Declan are at the stage where they actually share a few common interests and watching them interact is my favorite parenting experience. Declan is loving monster trucks and motorcycles and all things with wheels and he'll roll them all over the house (like literally, up the walls and everything) and then when he's done he'll walk over and hand them to his brother and stand there gesturing and talking his rapid jibberish. Ez has no idea how to react and usually stares at me baffled until I cue him to say "thank you Declan" which he repeats in his little voice and Declan seems satisfies and wanders off to find another toy to share with his brother. Cutest thing ever. Bath time is another bonding experience for them. Splashing water within a 12 foot radius never fails to get laughs out of both of them. Chasing each other in circles around the house. Building, and more importantly, destroying block towers. Ransacking and hiding in mommy's closet. I was shocked that they were able to sit quietly side by side in my closet trying not to get caught. Who knew they could be silent for minutes at a time?? Stealing each other's toys and then tattling on each other... All the normal brotherly stuff ;)
And in case you're not convinced, here are several more glimpses into the crazy I deal with on a daily basis. (Thank you YouTube for turning one of my clips upside down...):
I've done a few day in our life posts, including the most recent one right after Declan was born. At that point in our lives it was all chaos and takeout food and survival mode. Lately we've settled into a nice routine, we're completely unpacked (as of last week - don't judge!) and we're loving our new home, so I wanted to do an updated day in our life post. But then, as soon as I thought, Hey, I've kinda got things under control. Maybe I can handle this whole parenting two kids thing, this happened:
After a night of musical beds where I was woken up so many times that I literally had no idea where I was or who was crying, we woke up to day two of a hoarse, raspy-voiced toddler who was just so pitiful sounding and in pain, so off to the doctor we went. It took me + a nurse to hold Ez down long enough for the doctor to look down his throat. That's all, just shine that light thingy down his throat. Imagine how awful his next round of shots is gonna be. Then we got the news that not only is Ez getting more molars (seriously the most awful, horrible, hateful things ever!), but he's also got bronchitis. My poor baby. We head straight to the pharmacy (aka - Target) to pick up his meds. As soon as I pull into the parking lot both boys fall asleep, and all I've got is the single stroller. So I'm walking through Target, killing half an hour while they fill the prescription, using one hand to push Ez in the stroller while also carrying Declan in his car seat. No less than four people stop to smile and point out that I have my hands full. Really? Do I? I hadn't even noticed. And can I just point out that seeing all that cute fall stuff at Target but not being able to touch or browse was really sad. Like really. I did pick up a get well gift for Ez though, because mom priorities. Once we got home I wrestled Ez to the ground in order to force feed him his medicine. He actually likes the way it tastes, but that doesn't stop him from putting up a fight each and every time. Then I go to pick up Declan, who is also screaming, only to find poo up to his hair. And all over my hands. Emergency bath time. While I'm trying to spray down a wriggly, slippery, screaming baby Ez bursts into the bathroom with such force that the door bounces off the wall and hits him right in the face. Cue screaming baby #2. So for about the 50th or so time both kids are simultaneously screaming bloody murder. And did I mention this was all before lunch?
Lesson learned. Never ever ever tempt fate by thinking you've got things figured out. She will laugh right in your face and throw you curve ball after curve ball until you admit that you know nothing. Nothing at all.
So I totally acknowledge that I'm just taking parenthood day by day, and sometimes it's literally all chaos and tears, but the other days when all pandemonium hasn't broken loose look something like this:
Our weekdays follow the same basic formula. I get up whenever the earliest riser wakes me up (not counting Joe, who usually leaves before we're awake). On the off chance Declan wakes up before 7am, he hangs out with daddy while I get some more zzzs. Typically Ez and Declan wake up between 7 and 8, then Declan likes to cluster nap till 9 or 10. We appreciate lazy mornings and start off with breakfast, Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, and of course iced coffee for me.
Ez is generally pretty good at entertaining himself in the mornings. He likes being reunited with all his cars after a whole night away from them. So if Declan is napping this is my blog and chore time.
Late morning/early afternoon is when we gotta get out of the house before everyone starts going crazy. Some things we like to do are story time at the library, a trip to the park, walks around the neighborhood, errands, meeting my sister for lunch, or just playing in the garden. Declan is always strapped to me in his Bjorn carrier, facing outward because he's very social and likes to people watch.
Sometimes Ez falls asleep in his stroller and naps up to two hours, otherwise we eat lunch. Then Declan naps and Ez and I get some one on one time (unless they're both napping - hallelujah!) We read books, color, do puzzles, play monster bowling, or I sit on the floor while he plays cars. Sometimes he just needs an audience.
Around 5 I'll start prepping dinner while Ez and Declan either join me in the kitchen or entertain themselves (Declan loves playing in his exersaucer - a total lifesaver!) Joe gets home around 6 and we eat dinner shortly after.
Post dinner we usually head straight to the park where Joe and Ez play together while I walk laps with Declan strapped to me. We usually spend about half an hour there then head home to clean up, bathe everyone, and relax.
Ez and Declan both go to sleep at 9. Declan was waking up only once or twice a night, but in the past week it jumped up to 4 times. Probably another instance of fate laughing at me.
On Fridays we pick Joe up from work and go out to dinner as a family then walk around, check out some shops, play at the park, and just unwind for the weekend.
Weekends are for exploring and we always like to get out of the house and do stuff together as a family. Now that we're in a brand new area there's so much stuff we wanna check out and our Bay Area bucket list seems to grow daily.
This season of life with multiple littles is just so much everything. So much fun. So tiring. So many laughs. So many tears. So many cuddles. And most importantly it goes by so fast. I know when I look back at this in a month or two our lives and routine will be completely different and I'll probably be laughing at the whole poo bath/door straight to the face memory. (I may have had to turn away and stifle laughter at the door slamming incident right when it happened. Does anyone else's kids injure themselves daily, or is mine just extra accident prone?) I probably won't ever find the bronchitis or molars funny, but by then hopefully it will be a distant memory.
And then there were three! Joe is back in the office for pretty much the first time since Declan was born. Having an extra set of hands around for the past two and a half months made the transition from one to two much easier. For that I feel so, so lucky. The few days in the beginning that it was just me and the boys were rough. I'm sure all of you with more than two kids are laughing at me right now. I just didn't have enough hands or lap space to keep everyone happy, and all those extra tears are hard on a new mama's heart. But now we've hit our stride and this week is actually running more smoothly than I anticipated. I think we're all ready to build a new routine and I'm sure Joe is much more productive in an office as opposed to being home with us crazies all day long.
As you can see from the picture above, there are still a few tears, but Ez loves his little brother so much and he's adjusted from being super clingy and emotional back to being his normal helpful and independent self. He really needed some extra attention and snuggles with all the change going on, and I'm so glad Joe and other family were around to give him that when I was busy with Declan. Or vice versa.
The true test for any parent is that first solo shopping trip. It's always such a daunting thought. I remember when Ez was a newborn I spent way too much time thinking about the logistics of it all before he and I made our first shopping trip. Carrier or car seat in the cart? Plan B if he has a meltdown mid-trip? Now with two, I'm less concerned with the minor details and more worried about being outnumbered. But in both cases I just bit the bullet and went for it and you know what? It wasn't bad at all. It was actually surprisingly pleasant. Of course I chose Target for our inaugural trip. I think most moms agree that Target is alluring enough to actually warrant leaving the house with your littles. The trip went so smoothly that I even had a chance to browse the women's clearance racks. $5 workout pants really are a necessity if you stop to think about it. Ez had a mini hunger meltdown toward the end, but I let him pick his own snack bars and eat it in the cart and all was well in the world again. Bonus points that Declan found it absolutely hilarious to have Ez sitting in the cart right in front of him.
It's only been a few days, so I'm not going to pretend to have it all figured out, but so far I've actually been more productive with Joe gone. I think having him around made it feel like vacation mode and now it feels like real life. Ez is at a great age where he loves to help me with whatever I'm doing, so I just include him when I'm doing chores and everybody is happy.
Declan follows us from room to room in his little chair and he's perfectly content as long as he can see and hear us. Between Ez's thoughtfulness and Declan's laid backedness, I honestly don't know how I got so lucky.
Big changes are coming! We're moving tomorrow and all these changes have me feeling a little nostalgic. Joe and I were talking about how weird it is that Ez and Declan won't even remember living in So Cal, even though it's such a big part of our lives. It's the place where Joe and I met and fell in love. I spent both my pregnancies here and both Ez and Declan were born here. We've created so many great memories as a family. So you'll have to pardon all my sentimental rambling, but in the midst of throwing all our belongings into boxes, going through old photos, and packing up all Declan's newborn clothes (already??) I've put together a little list of things I want to remember from right here and now, before we grow and change and embark on this new and exciting chapter of our lives.
Declan's first smiles and how he chuckles to himself in his sleep.
Ez's Betty Boop curl above his right ear. He threw a huge fit while getting his haircut and the stylist was probably afraid she'd chop his ear off if she tried to trim it, and it kind of grew on me, so I left it.
Ez saying incomprehensible things in the loudest, most urgent and excited voice, then repeating it with equal intensity each time we ask him to repeat himself. I have no idea what he's saying half the time, but I love his enthusiasm.
Declan's brownish, grayish, bluish eyes, that will most probably turn brown, but are taking much longer than Ez's did.
The sweet snuggles Ez gives Declan and the brotherly concern he shows when Declan cries.
How Ez plays with his cars while narrating and singing to himself. I love his imagination so much.
Ez and Declan's super long lashes. So not fair!
Ez's excited gallop. His energy and joy for life is so infectious.
The way Declan's cries actually sound like "wah"!
Ez singing wheels on the bus with a huge emphasis every time he sings town:
Declan's baby squeaks and babbles. I can already tell he'll be a chatterbox.
Here's a choppy little video of some random cuteness that I want to remember:
A lot of people have asked how Ez is adjusting to Declan, and for the moment his views on big brotherhood are a mix of emotions. He's curious, affectionate, and every now and then he can be persuaded to share his cars (aka, he lays them gently on Declan's chest for half a minute before he hurriedly takes them back). He has a fascination with touching Declan's face, which isn't Declan's favorite thing in the world, but it could be worse. He's also extremely jealous of all the time Declan spends on mommy's lap, but that was expected. So for a two year old, I think he's handling all these changes like a champ.
Joe has been working from home, so most of our days include lots of couch-time snuggles while we avoid the midday heat. My favorite part of the day.
We're settling into a nice routine of morning and evening play dates so Ez can run off some energy while Declan naps in the stroller.
Some of our favorite ways to cool off this summer include splashing in the water table or the hose, pretending to wash mommy's car, froyo dates, the splash pad, and evening walks.
And that pretty much sums up our summer so far. Since I feel somewhat comfortable in our routine, that means it will change again soon. Like tomorrow. Parenthood has a way of always keeping you on your toes ;)
